oh thank god

I was about to die, but I can see this again. I can read you can read. Ha who is the you in that sentence? Return to missives to nowhere.

I can post

but I can't see my blog. That's fucked. I'm the only effing person who reads this! Why can't I read this!?!?!??!

Oh my GAWD.

I watched Forrest Gump which I hate hate hated. Then I watched the Oh in Ohio which I love love love love love love loved. Now right now I'm watching Junebug which I am loving hating loving.  How did I not know about this one? It's squirmy in just the right places. Ryan Atwood with a dirt 'stash. Ok Ok maybe a little too squirmy. Why do all indie films feature unlikable or at least un-relatable people? I kinda want to punch them all. Or most of them. 

Cats are taking little naps. I should too and also fuck this movie/ I love this movie. I cannot make up my mind. There is perhaps a deficit of Parker Posey. I want a film in which Parker Posey plays all of the roles. Maybe that would be un-watchable. I don't know.

I'm supposed go to a party tonight and I don't know how I feel about that. I'm supposed to get some work done tonight and I know how I feel about that. Not great. Is how I feel about that. 

Oh and American spiritual music is way the fuck better than British spiritual music.

What else is in my brain? God Damn Near Nothing. I have been digging Warren Ellis' blog. I have been digging Questionable Content. I have been digging The Totally Rad Show, I've been digging Alec Longstreth, I have been wallowing in my depression and self-pity. I keep accidentally making noises when I am almost asleep that are loud enough to wake me back up. It makes me crazy and I thought I had left it behind. years ago. All I want to do is take a bath but these fucking silk painting ladies are in my house and if I took a bath it would block their access to the toilet. Fucking bleghtttt. Cats are still napping. They are in exactly the same position six inches apart, curled up in balls with their arms over their eyes. Little balls of sheddy weirdness. 

Listening to Xiu Xiu all day. All day. Grapefruit Jews all day. All day. Messy house all day. All day. Gotta do the laundry but I don't wanna. Gotta walk past fat pelvised old women to do that that at at. So over this day. Xiu Xiu on the speakers but GOODBYE HORSES in my head. All Day. I can take a bath in two and a half hours.

That's exciting I guess. King "Frankie" Mob is being a big weirdo about some tinfoil. Seriously, foil. 

I wonder if I'm as disappointing as I feel. I imagine so but I can't really know that. OK. I've got this existential unwellness over the fact that I've got to get up and try to get Tom Waits tickets in a couple of days because I won't be able to get them and then I will spend an awful lot of money, which I will do, because I'm made of stupid. 

This movie's almost done. There are so many parts that are really really lovely, but it feels like there's unpleasantness surrounding everything that happens just because. It's like Me, You, and Everyone We Know that way. Wasting the day away. Now it's Gone Baby Gone.

Can't use the internet 'til the fat pelvis ladies are gone so what else am I supposed to do.

Gone Baby Gone is making me feel vindicated for not drinking Ben Affleck hateraid. He was just in a bunch of piece of shit movies that weren't his fault. Welcome back from hacksville Morgan Freeman.

I want to take a bath RIGHT NOW!  K'F'M won't chill the fuck out and it's making me crazy. I wish he was more like Lulu Robin sometimes but she's so aloof. I guess that's the way that goes. Cake and eating it etc.

I think I need to get sober for a while.

Nothing in particular reminds me that other people have had more sex in my bed than I have had sex in my bed. I feel sorrier for the bed than I feel sorry for myself.

Tonight

Big plans as you can see. I found my zippo after much, much searching. Pocket of a disused jacket, of course. Music is Goodbye Horses and Metal Heart, because, frankly, why not. When I sing Metal Heart, I have to drop my voice so so low to make it make sense. Curse my limited vocal range and utter lack of talent. Early forecasts point to shit getting out of hand, and who am I to argue with forecasters. I love you nobody.

I feel good. My shirt is freshly ironed. The importance of a freshly ironed shirt cannot be overstated. Go Iron Your Clothes!

I heard James Lipton on the Treatment earlier. I am now watching actor's studio. Huzzah!

Oh man

I'm gonna take a bath and read Cash by Johnny Cash. If it's good enough for Cusack, it's good enough for me.

Ugh, I went to good friends Dave & Vicky's house for Man U v Chelsea. I got home at like three in the morning. That shit is just silly. Old people! Tom Waits is coming to my country. Oh my. Gonna watch Parker Posey movies! I love her love love love love love her!

PS twitter eats my life plz add me plz.

Walk

I took a break for three hours to take a walk with pretty boy James Crisp. At first he made me feel good because he told me I looked really hot. Hours later he told me that I was smarter when he first met me. It was a wash I guess. We did some good Glasgow exploration anyway.

Bandanarama

Californication and Cat Power are Crack to Me.

New tattoo design almost done. 

I started Project Runway with Season 4, and now, going back to Season 2, HOLY FUCK ARE THESE PEOPLE UNTALENTED. It's amazing to see a show work in such stark opposition to the traditional television truism of diminishing returns. I spent the afternoon doing clerical work for my friend David whilst watching, and it was kind of perfect. The juxtaposition of the lala drama and excel spreadsheets was delightful and I recommend it fully. 

I will now go and paint four bathrooms. How did this life happen to me?

PS Movie night with James tomorrow! 90s Teen Theme!

PPS I just got an invitation to my super super cool friend Mai's When I Grow Up, I Want to Be... party. Initial thoughts? Fuck I don't know, I've got this fucking beard. I hate bets!

PPPS Oh Oops, as promised, bandanacity. 

I am dressed like a crazy person and I am enjoying a magazine. Just sayin'.

Sunday morning...

I taught sunday school today! Fun! We coloured in dolphins and butterflies and starfish and birds and all sorts of things for Genesis 1. How fucking crazy is my job? We had glitter paint! I am now watching Project Runway and working on the design for my next tattoo. Chaos Magik Sigils Woo! Someday Tim Gunn will be MINE!

My  wants you all dead.

To everyone

I think I might have to give up my email address because I fucked up so hard last night that now I'm scared of it. Stupid effing effer.

Oops.

Looks like someone's still learning how to format.

Edit: This is no longer relevent.

Broken Guitar!!!!

Banalities of my life

This is new to me so I'm just talk talk talking.

                                                           

                                            

     

I feel like a new man and I'm going to do some ironing.

OK

King Mob/ Frankie is angry today

I loves my new broken watch.

I will now take a bath and read the Gotham Central trade that just came in the mail. 

Ugh (Pronounced like in a Clipse track)

Last night I had many beers and watched Teeth and discovered twitter and lastfm did several things I now regret heavily. Oh well. I spent a couple of hours going thru the BME Blog and it seems to be a magic hangover cure. The stupid shit that's going down between Shannon and his ex-wife makes my heart hurt. Oh well. I'ma take a bath and read comic books.